I Wouldn't Have Come to See You If I Knew You Were Black

Racism Breakthrough Coaching 3 min read

I've had some interesting times since I started out on this journey of being more in and of the world in October 2000. Racism and being black came into it pretty early on in my career both in terms of my one-to-one Breakthrough Coaching Sessions and my corporate consultancy work.

With one story I shared many moons ago, it happened around 2002, people were stunned and even asked if I was making it up.

Thankfully I Arrived Just After Such Racism Was Blatant Thing

I did have a website and brochures however there were no photos of me, we didn't have social media, and apparently to the untrained ear I don't sound black on the phone. A woman arrived for a Breakthrough Coaching Session and was somewhat uncomfortable; not entirely unusual given the nature of my work and the perception of therapy back then so I let it slide for a little while.

About 30 minutes in I asked if she was OK and if there was something she wanted to say before we got started. Her response was:

"She didn't realise I was black. If she had she wouldn't have booked the Session. Said her father was an out and out racist and she wasn't far behind him."

Even though it was very late in the day for a cancellation I asked if she wanted a refund or to just get on with it now she'd taken the time and trouble to arrive.

It's a bit like choosing which door to go through during a Future Life Progression Session.

Future Doors FLP Future Life Progression

She opted for Door Number 2 and stayed.

I Didn't Recognise the Handwriting So Was Curious

We had a great Session.

From Drink & Drugs & Self-Harming to This

The Christmas of the same year I received a card from her. It was a Christmas and Thank You and Apology card. She was doing brilliantly at University; she had previously been doing drink, drugs, and self-harming, which was affecting her ability to even get to lectures, nevermind being able to concentrate and focus on what was going on.

Her head was also "straight" and she was filled with confidence so was writing to apologise for what she'd said; I was fine with it because I would rather people be honest rather than say and do things behind my back.

She was drinking, doing drugs and self-harming

She was also writing to thank me for helping to change her life and to wish me a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Incredible Life Change and TranceFormation in Just 1-Day

It is incredible how much your life can change and TranceForm in just a few short hours. With my change of career anniversary fast approaching at the time of writing this Blog, I wrote a piece about some of the ways this Breakthrough work got started in the public eye. You can read it here: http://marilyndevonish.com/breaking-up-the-easy-way-it-only-took-6-hours/

Don't Cry For Me

When I first shared the story 16 years ago many were angry and outraged that she said such a thing to my face, and asked how I managed to be civil and carry on with the 7-8 hour Breakthrough Session.

My take on it was she had paid me to do a job. Had now agreed she wanted to change her life and let go of the limiting beliefs, negative emotions, and destructive behaviours, so let's do thing thing.

For every one person that says it out loud I know there are many others who quietly pass you by or withhold business and opportunities in the background. I would rather hear what people think rather than have them sabotage me.

We have come a long way in terms of racism and equality, and there is definitely still a way to go . . . .

In terms of the Corporate work it was my first solo assignment as a Management Consultant and I was sat both nervous and excited in reception at Her Majesty's Treasury Department to design a corporate Team Away Day and deliver Executive Coaching Sessions. I'll save that rather jaw dropping story for another day.

Marilyn Devonish

The NeuroSuccess Coach

Race Racism Breakthrough Coaching Life Changing Drink Drugs University Self Harm